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8 Reasons Why I Won’t Cut Down a Christmas Tree Ever Again…

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ChristmasTree2ChristmasTree3OMGTreeChristmasTree1I thought it would be magical to cut down our very own Christmas tree this year. It seemed so adventurous and a little glamorous too, kind of like glamping. So this year I made my family go to the adorable tree farm about 40 minutes from our house to cut down our tree. In my mind we’d enjoy a cup of hot cocoa and take our time exploring the man-made forest of trees until the perfect one appears in front of us, like a beacon of light complete with a shining star. Let me just say, I will never cut down a Christmas tree down ever again. Below are 8 reasons why…tree5

1. There was only one type of tree and it was a terrible type. It looked like a shaggy Grinch.

2. We kept walking and walking and walking thinking a better tree would show up. It never did and before we knew it , we just walked 1 mile and then had to drag ourselves, our child and our tree back to the stand.

3. You must look down while walking since there are stumps from previous tree choppers everywhere! Romeo fell and scraped his back. Insert hysterical crying fit.

4. The incredibly cheesy saw they provided broke with two strokes on the branch. Thank goodness I didn’t have to walk back for that one, I made Zan do it.

5. We had to drive 4o miles back home with a tree tied to our roof, going 40 in a 65. Enough said.

6. In the ground they all looked straight, but once we got home and tried to place the tree in the stand we found out it wasn’t straight at all and it kept falling.

7. Since it was too tall and not straight and we don’t have real tools yet (we’ve never had to own them until we bought a house!) we tried to use a fine tooth hack saw to cut the bottom. The tree claimed its second saw in a day. Broke in half. Zan and I were in the front yard at midnight each  jumping on one side of the tree to get it to break. Hopefully no one saw us…oh tannenbaum nightmare!

8. We came home everyday to the worst looking tree with enormous holes throughout it. It made Charlie Brown’s tree look like the Rockefeller tree. I couldn’t even convince Zan to decorate it with me, so it sat there for days with a string of lights and two ornaments, which it wouldn’t hold because the branches were too weak. California grown. Zan called it garland-on-a-stick.

9. So basically we wasted hours and money just to throw it in the backyard and buy a Noble Fir. They are truly the best trees.

And that’s why I’m never cutting down my own tree again… Bah humbug!

 

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12 responses to 8 Reasons Why I Won’t Cut Down a Christmas Tree Ever Again…

  1. Kimyee
    December 10, 2013

    I think I laughed out loud with this one! You guys simply are adorable. ‘Tis the season! 😉

  2. sharon
    December 10, 2013

    oh yes, the crooked trunk…..my dad who usually doesnt swear, would sure cut loose while trying to get our tree straight in the tree stand. my mom would shoosh us kids out of the room. ha. not very happy memories. enjoy your nice tree!

  3. Kristin
    December 10, 2013

    Omg!!! I’m dying! A shaggy grinch is the perfect description for that sad little tree! I agree, nobles are the prettiest! At least you can look back and laugh at your little adventure! And how cute is lil Romeo?!

  4. Tammie
    December 10, 2013

    This is hilarious!
    Thanks for the advice and the laughs.

  5. Ruthie
    December 10, 2013

    That’s hilarious!! Thanks for keeping it real 🙂

    1. Ruthie
      December 10, 2013

      PS I’m picturing a Chevy Chase moment!

      1. Eden
        December 12, 2013

        Yes!! Total Chevy Chase moment… that is one of my favorite Christmas movies! It’s the BEST!! 🙂

  6. December 10, 2013

    LOL! I’m cracking up over here. We’re noble fir lovers here, too. 😉

  7. Cyd
    December 12, 2013

    Hahahah too funny! We did end up cutting down our own tree and LOVED everything about it (and the tree). However, the previous day we’d gone to a different tree farm and when I realized an hour in that a similar experience to yours was probably inevitable we bailed, grabbed hot cocoa and went home. The next day we made out much much better. 😉

    1. Eden
      December 12, 2013

      Cyd! That’s hilarious you bailed the first time! Maybe I would give it a try again if I could cut down a Noble!! The ones they grow in SoCal just don’t cut it! I’m so happy you guys had a great time and you’re lucky they served hot cocoa, haha!! XOXO

  8. December 14, 2013

    SO sad! It will be a year to remember for sure.

  9. December 17, 2013

    haha so funny!! Good to know we will never be doing this! P.S. Zan’s face is priceless!! haha!

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